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How
to start a Tasar Rivalry, or
The Peach Arch Gates May Close Soon....
It
all started innocently enough. I bought this new Tasar to have fun and sail
with my girlfriend. I’d spent the last several years in testosterone
plagued dinghies and was ready for a mellow class. Some call me reptilian in
nature and I’ve been fascinated with flying reptiles, so somehow my boat
ends up being named Pteranodon. Most people cannot pronounce it, but here is
a hint, the “P’ is silent.
Anyway,
we head to the Flights of Spring as neophytes. We got pretty lucky and
finished 4th, but behind a couple of hot Canadians from Vancouver Island.
One of them is Todd Blumel. Nice enough guy, but he gets this notepad out
and a measuring tape and starts going all over my boat. I just came from an
Olympic class, so this was blasphemous behavior! AJ: “Hey, get away from
my boat!”
TB:
“I’m the class measurer and your strop is too long!’ AJ: “What’s a
strop?? and get away from my boat! TB 1,
PP 0.
Next
regatta is SOCKS and Team Blumel (TB) is gunning for us and succeeding.
They beat us in every race on Saturday on my home water. I’m pretty bummed
at the Saturday banquet but Sharon keeps saying, “There is always
tomorrow”. (note to self: listen to her more often.) Sunday dawns blustery
and cold and Pteam Pteranodon (PP) is flying in the big breeze. We end up
beating them in every race on Sunday, barely edging them in the last race to
beat them by one point. TB
1, PP 1.
We
are both looking forward to the Jericho Classic. At least one of us will
leave with bragging rights until the next event. We have an epic battle with
many close finishes between us. With one race left, Team Blumel has 29
points, Pteam Pteranodon has 30 points. Todd actually listens to Leslie and
they have a fine race finishing 4th to our 7th. Todd starts immediately with
the bragging saying something like “I can beat you even though your strop
is illegal!” It was a long drive home. TB
2, PP 1.
Allan Johnson and Sharon Moran with Pteranodon
I’m at work getting excited for WAVES, when Todd sends a message to the Tasar list asking: “Who is going to Waves??” I think he was wavering between kayaking, Mountain Biking or the like.. .anyway I sent a one sentence reply: “Pteam Pteranodon is going to kick your butt!’ In hindsight, this may not have been a good move for PP, but at least I helped get one more boat to WAVES. So we are all sitting on the beach waiting for wind because it is light and misting (like all English Bay regattas this year!) and Todd walks up to me and asks me if he can borrow some tape.
Sure
enough, I hand him some excellent 3M vinyl tape and think nothing of it. He
returns it like a good rival should and soon we are out on the water. Todd
and Leslie sail by in the pre start with big smiles on their faces and as
they pass I see what my tape was used for. On their transom in big red taped
letters is the name “PBUTT”. This sent me in to chaotic fits that
Sharon’s consoling could not contain. He had used my tape to mimic me. In
a moment of composure, I thought aloud: “We’ll just stay ahead of him,
that way I won’t have to see those Scarlet Letters!” That in hindsight
was a bad move as well, as we watched that transom sail to third place in
the regatta as we had our worst event of the season. TB 3, PP
2.
The
Glacier Bowl at Squamish. Dramatic and windy, just to Pteam Pteranodon’s
liking, but Team Blumel comes out hot with a 1,3 to our 8, DNC (we broke one
of those forestays.) But then Todd and Leslie’s mast step sheared off and
they would have to miss the next two races. I felt bad for them, really I
did. On Sunday, we beat them in every race, with the last race being a rival
duel and Todd screaming at us all the way from the last weather mark down
to the finish. Two lengths behind and he feels compelled to scream
“Room!” at the finish line to which I retort “Arrrrrgghhhh!” And I
thought I had left ptestosterone plagued dinghies... TB 3, PP 2.
At
this point the rivalry has gotten out of hand. We are at the point of
finding out which of us is going to a regatta, so the other can skip it.
Pteam Pteranodon skips Cowichan Bay (It’s Todd’s home court, I’m
not stupid!) and BC Champs. (We’ve lost two regattas to them on English
Bay!) Team Blumel skips the US Nationals at Orcas. (Something about the
Moran legend...) We both decide a peace meeting is in order. Sharon and I
will travel to the land of totems and break bread with the Blumels. We
both agree to arrive without our Tasars. Gee, without Tasars, we are both
actually really nice people and we actually really enjoy one another. We
have a fabulous dinner and a wonderful time. Todd is still regretting his
wasteful and tasteless use of my tape and he buys dinner. (I asked Sharon if
we get a point for that, and she said no, They Do!... but there was never really any consensus on that... so the score remains the same.) TB 3, PP 2.
The North Americans. The ultimate event. The
decider. We are both there. We are friendly. We are excited to race. But
we’ll have to wait a day, since there is no wind on Saturday. On Sunday,
neither of us are looking that good after two races but our 9,7 is better
than their 11,10. Anything could happen. I instruct Sharon at the start of
Race 3 to find the Blumels and don’t take your eye off them. But Sharon
can’t find them and that must be bad, they are up in front of us
somewhere, we are in trouble. At the finish we can’t find them and they
have inexplicably disappeared from the race course. This means victory for
us! A hollow victory, but a victory nonetheless. TB 3,
PP 3. Allan Johnson
Reprinted from The NATA Newsletter, Winter
2000
posted 2001/01/23